Today is January 17, 2010. It is 17 days until the first anniversary of the Accident.
I am starting to feel an inexorable pull
on the fluids in my body,
as though a different source of gravity is affecting me
a sort of tide rising
I can't stop the days from passing
In 17 days I will wake up, it will be a Wednesday
Once again, there will be nothing I can do to stop what happened.
The liquid in my body seeping into my lungs
inevitability
will there be a memorial in Managua? of course there will be.
remembering, mourning
i see my body lying in the dirt next to theirs
how much have their bodies decomposed?
how much have I decomposed?
damp leaves
ants
plastic bags blowing across the cemetery
soft rain
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